Wewriteabout.life

Author: J

  • JWA: Death(the loss of a love)

    Light shines in the darkest places —

    If you know where to look

    How many ways can you describe the abyss of death? When you gaze into it, it gazes back. If you love it, does it love you back? 

    Loss of a love is a special feeling of depth. A depth so deep it’s simultaneously unfathomable and fathomable. A void you scream into that never replies. 

    ———

    You\’ve gazed upon their being. The one you’ve grown to tolerate and love. Every mole, blemish, and imperfection of their soul, giving life to this perfect creature before you, bound to you by an unexplainable thread. It’s a presence that you’ve tested and similarly, have been tried by. Yet, you’ve never cast it out. Always occupying the same room in your heart, proving that there was always so much more you could have offered. Nevertheless, they’ve wandered around in there and gradually made claim of the rooms they’ve passed by, adding their own little sticky notes in the book of “you”. 

    ———

    Now, you gaze upon that same heart. It was far bigger than you could have ever imagined. It surprises you that such an immense volume of nothingness could exist within your tiny frame. For a brief moment that lasts a lifetime, you peer into the black, unable to focus. Your eyes have nothing to focus on. Seeing blind, you leap in, perhaps hoping to catch the fabled glimpse of comfort. Perhaps a shimmering crinkle in the ink black fabric offering serendipity. But nothing happens. You are still on that edge, diving deeper, cascading into darker, staler depths by which time a profound feeling of helplessness and solitude cocoons you entirely and your world is perfectly black. Time stopped when they fell still in your arms. The world lost its colour when the casket became heavy. Existence was cold as you watched the fire. And now your world will never be again. 

    ———


    “And soon as you submit

    Surrender flesh and bone

    Love takes on a life

    Far greater than your own

    It uses you at will

    And drives you to despair

    And forces you to feel

    More joy than you can bear

    Love gives you pleasure

    Love gives you pain

    And yet when both are gone

    Love will still remain”

    ~ Love Never Dies, Andrew Lloyd Webber

  • JWA: Interesting vs Basic

    First of all, I’d like to mention in advance that I do not look down on people I find “basic”. I simply tend to find “interesting” people more appealing.

    Obviously, “interesting” is very subjective. What I find to be interesting, may not be the case for someone else. However, if you do find something that sparks interest in you, the further down the rabbit hole, the more it intrigues you. For example, when you learn a subject that you like, the foundations are rather common knowledge. everyone knows that 1 + 1 = 2 and the earth is flat. Jk. As you get deeper into the topic, things get a little bit more interesting. When something appears to be more common, it becomes more boring. Sure, there are timeless activities you will always seem to get an unchanging level of satisfaction out of but no matter how many times you do it, to others, it could get boring after a set amount of encounters.

    When I think of basic, I can’t help but also think of the word boring. I do have basic friends who I am close to and do not find boring but for the large majority of people, they do in fact bore me. At some point, seeing a similar person with one or two small differences in their personality is like doing a mathematical problem of y = mx + c but with different values of ‘m’, ‘x’ and ‘c’. it is different from the previous equations but also gets very monotonous and I find myself often desensitised by the experience of meeting “new people”, especially because of the ability to read them like a book.

    Interesting, however, is like….

    [Missing Image]

    Ok… this is a bit much, but my view still stands. In my eyes, interesting people aren’t always interesting. It sounds rather contradictory, doesn’t it?

    Let’s use math again. Yay, math.

    You get bored of y=mx+c and find quadratics. Suddenly, you’re more interested! It’s something entirely new but you get to combine what you knew before with it and can play around with the different dynamics that are available to you. When you keep searching for more and more, you eventually find that quadratics(by itself) becomes less interesting or boring.

    I find that interesting people are further away from what I consider myself to be very common. Which means that I am also boring to other people. As a matter of fact, after knowing myself for so long and being able to read myself, I find myself boring. To touch on William Phang’s “We will never be happy. Why we should strive to be anyways.“, around paragraph 7, he talks about an animal, constantly seeking a higher level of happiness, while another, remains at a constant, perfectly content with the level it is at. In a similar way, I liken that to people that I find interesting and basic.

    In general, you cannot stop growth. you can stunt it to the point where there is barely any increase but it will keep increasing no matter what. Who is to say what you should do or have to do? No one.

    I just realised that people are like eevees…. you start out as a basic eevee and have the option to gain experience and evolve into many variants. some just choose to remain content with the evolution stage they are at.